Another key to successful disciplining as a parent is to remember: never get mad. This goes right along with the idea that rules are bigger than both of you, you are just doing your job when you enforce them. When you start to get angry, your effectiveness as a disciplinarian quickly disintegrates.
This occurs for a number of reasons. First, the display of emotion on
your part is empowering and therefore rewarding to the child. This
reward may cancel out any punishment you mete out. Also and perhaps
more importantly, if the child is needing to be disciplined it is because
they are out of control. If you are angry you are out of control too,
and the child knows it. To a young child, if he is out of control
and his parents are out of control, the whole world seems
out of control. That’s frightening. Frightened children don’t learn,
and the goal of discipline is teaching.
Therefore, a key skill for a parent to learn is how to “keep their cool” while disciplining. Your attitude while disciplining should be that “we do not take this personally”. The minute you start to feel yourself get mad,you would be better off abandoning any attempt to discipline the child and work instead on getting yourself back under control.